Words are fussy things (A)
Meaning on the move (B)
Bells, whistles and rings (a)
Words are fussy things (A)
When the poet sings (a)
And the flowers prove (b)
Words are fussy things (A)
Meaning on the move (B)
Meaning on the move (B)
Bells, whistles and rings (a)
Words are fussy things (A)
When the poet sings (a)
And the flowers prove (b)
Words are fussy things (A)
Meaning on the move (B)
This form seems to be fairly simple at first sight, but you might find that when you sit down to write one that you get stuck. What I have the most trouble with is that there are only five distinct lines, and that the (A) refrain has to be used three times... makes me think closely about the line (A) & (B). Here's another example from today's writing:
Virgil led Dante down to hell
Dirty soap suds spiral the drain
Like Satan thrown from heaven fell
Virgil led Dante down to hell
A ghastly and sulfuric smell
Chased each breath with a shot of pain
Virgil led Dante down to hell
Dirty soap suds spiral the drain
Dirty soap suds spiral the drain
Like Satan thrown from heaven fell
Virgil led Dante down to hell
A ghastly and sulfuric smell
Chased each breath with a shot of pain
Virgil led Dante down to hell
Dirty soap suds spiral the drain
And if you want to get really adventurous with this form, you might try to change the refrain lines with punctuation. Some writers will put a comma or a fullstop in a refrain and have it lead into the next line to enhance the effect or to change the meaning of the line. Once you've got the rules down, the thing to do next is to break them! If you decide to try a triolet, let me know so I can check it out. I'd love to see what you come up with.
12 comments
Tell you what Jon...I will break the rules before I know them so that when I know them I will also know I have a'ready broken them. ;-]
October 21, 2009 5:04 AMMy goodness there are so many forms that have arisen and taken root over the past three millennium that to keep them all clear is a lifetimes occupation.
I can't wait to get going on this.... hah; wonderful!
October 21, 2009 11:42 AMyour two examples make me smile
Walking man,
October 21, 2009 1:31 PMHA! What's the point of rules if you can't break them! And yeah, there are some who will spend a lifetime sorting through all the different forms that have been discovered... and then discover new ones as well.
Harle,
Thought you'd like this form. Looking forward to what you come up with on this.
i gave it a try - see "sad song" on my blog
October 22, 2009 8:39 AMtimmy,
October 22, 2009 3:25 PMthanks! will do that... see you there
have done the deed.... and will likely try another!
October 23, 2009 9:27 PMthanks
Harle,
October 25, 2009 2:28 PMThanks... I go on over and check it out!
My brain hurts. But I'll put this somewhere in the whirred blender and see what I can find.
October 26, 2009 5:38 PMStraight from the blender:
October 26, 2009 8:37 PMGentile Triolet, Je te plumerais
http://anonandonagain.blogspot.com/2009/10/i-met-you.html
Thanks Anon Andon,
October 30, 2009 8:30 AMI'll get over to your site and check this out. Hope the brain and the subconscious soup has settled...
That soup never settles, Jon; and the soup kitchen never closes.
October 30, 2009 12:58 PMIf it works for your expressive project, feel free to add me to the blogs list.
Anon Andon,
October 30, 2009 1:23 PMWill do... you're on the hit list now!
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